Beware of falling monkeys!

My master, Grandmaster Moo Yong Lee was in town this weekend to sit on the board for the black belt test.  Over the years, I have seen him many times calm and refocus test candidates as they struggle to perform or remember something during a test.

“Even the monkey falls from the tree,” he will say.  He uses it in his usual calm, kind manner when correcting a mistake.  He admitted to me this weekend that this is one of his favorite sayings.  Its origins are a Korean proverb… 원숭이도 (even the monkey)나무에서 (tree, from) 떨어진다 (falls)

Humans aren’t perfect.  Neither are experts on their designated areas of expertise.  So if you are a mathematician and you solved a problem incorrectly, it doesn’t matter. Even experts make mistakes some times.  Though if you are a wrist watch repairman and you break a watch…just worry more about how you will deal with that customer.

Perfection and its attainment, is a goal of Taekwondo training.  The perfect, kick or punch with power, speed, accuracy, snap.  The perfect poomse.  The perfect balance of spirit, mind and body.

But here’s the secret.  It’s impossible.  You cannot always achieve it.  And when you do, it will be nearly impossible to reproduce it the next time.  It’s the nature of the universe. There must be balance in all things.  Between order & disorder, matter & anti-matter, love & hate, perfection & mistakes.

No one likes making a mistake.  Not even me!  It took me many years to finally be ok with, and confident enough to make a mistake.

This lesson is important for students and teachers in ANY field.   First for the students.   It’s ok to fail!!  Ok to make a mistake.  Sometimes, the way we learn best is by doing something wrong the first time.  We learn how NOT to do something.  Unfortunately, many times we don’t even TRY new things for fear of not being good enough, or making a mistake or getting embarrassed. 

The second part of this lesson is for those of you that are teachers, instructors or parents.  It’s ok let your students make mistakes!!  Our job is to give our students a comfortable, safe environment, where it’s ok to make a mistake.  Force them to work a situation out on their own.  And support them if they fail.  Start with wide, forgiving boundaries and tolerances.  Then make them tighter and stricter over time.

Growing up I had wonderful man in my life, Father George Schemel.  George, as we knew him, was a Jesuit priest that worked with my aunt.  Incredibly kind, and extremely intelligent George was there for me many times to provide support, compassion and guidance. Noticing that the young boy in front of him hated to make a mistake, he explained to me how to handle mistakes and embarrassment.  He told me to let these things hit me like a wave of water, wash over me, and then be gone.  Don’t let it linger.  Be done with it.

One thing I truly don’t like and don’t allow is self-destructive language.  Being self-deprecating and humble is fine, but you should never beat yourself up, or put yourself down endlessly for something.  Bruce Lee once said, “The mind is a fertile place…”.  Meaning whatever you plant there will grow.  Be that positive OR negative.

So…stand up straight; chin up.  Try your best.  Who knows maybe you’ll fail.  And if you do, let it 

wash over you.  Then, get up, dust off, and try again.

Keep training hard and I’ll see you on the mat!